Realization of What It is!

I was reading my son's Blog and I started to think about what really is happening to us. Yes, have to admit, that I have been wayyy out there on a cloud and he has been pretty much doing what he can to make sure that I have been alright. There has been a couple of posts that had me thinking, and that what our landlord had done to us really has been a Fucked up thing. (excuse my language). I am now realizing that the people that I have encountered here in the South Bay, really Suck!

I think back a couple of years, and I must say that I have gone through a lot. Yes, I realized that my kindness to people has been taken advantaged of. Yes, I was used, and I had to eat my mess. I guess you can say that being the sap that I am, well, got me into a lot of the mess that I am in now. I have been this way all of my life. My motto has always been, that If I can help out in any way, then I should. I tend not to think that way anymore, because I always get burned. I pretty much have grown cold to things that should not be so cold. People! Yepp, you read this right. :(

When I told my ex to leave, that was one of the bravest things that I have done. Since he has been gone, I have had an opportunity to be myself, and for the most part I think that I am an okay kind of person. I have found that you have to be happy with yourself first. before you can make anyone else happy. With that said, I know that I am happy in that way. I don't think that my immediate self needs to be changed to say that I am happy. Um... the point being, that I have yet to meet people, that are warm, caring, non back stabbing people since I have come back to California.

I am a native Californian, for that matter, I am a native San Franciscan. I was raised in an era.. Of Love, Peace, and Happiness. I still keep in touch with a few of my school friends, and those are the people, the kind of people that I really miss meeting and sharing my life with. Since my return to California, a little over seven years ago, I have met, people that do not think twice about stabbing someone in the back, people that are cold hearted, a very fast environment. See, what I gather is that people are the way they are out here is because they do not have the time! They do not have the time to care. They are too busy. And the fact that California is such a rich state, you know that MONEY, has a lot to do with their meaning. That is very very scary.
I have had the opportunity to work with alot of people of the upcoming generation. Now, That is a scary thing. Why? Well, one is that I had heard.. or read somewhere, that this upcoming generation... is ready to give up their first amendment rights, because it is too much of a bother? Come on now! Then there is the 'youngster' that I worked with that thought he was all that! That is until someone older decided to make more sales than him... then what? Oh yea, whining to the boss. Yes, the one that can sit there and list all the mistakes you have made, but when you find a mistake that he has made... oh, just fix it! Hmmmmm.... What does that tell me?

It tells me that they are not willing to learn by their mistakes, and that they will take what rights that are given to them; and just trash it away. Cover your *ss, is what it is called? Am I so wrong to think that there is hope for our society, when I am meeting people that JUST LOOKING OUT for themselves? These are people that might be government leaders. Yikes! I keep asking myself.. Is it the people of California, these days, that I am having a problem with? Or is it the upcoming generation?

I probably will be off line for a minute... or a longer minute! What happens to all of this, when the world will flood out, cuz of the global warming?? Where will these people spend there money? Will the young even care cuz its not happening to them NOW!?! Why would I put this post on my health blog? Knowing this, and unable to do anything about it, has caused my pressure to rise! Has this also put me into a mild depression? With that said, is my eating and sleep schedule.. oh, what schedule ? Ahh, now my blood sugar has gone wacko!

PE@CE!